Being Vulnerable

Today was the last day of one of my classes and I will miss it. It has truly been a blessing to have the opportunity to be apart of such an amazing group of people. As you may have guessed, this wasn't just a regular class. This class was a community. A community where we could be open with one another and share our life struggles. Where we were accepted and not laughed at. Even though some weeks it may have been hard to be vulnerable, it was worth it in the end. You see, for this class each week every person completed a spiritual discipline practice from Calhon's Spiritual Disciplines Handbook. Then at class every week we would share with one another what we experienced, and what we learned through participating in that spiritual discipline. This sharing time was an opportunity to be vulnerable. Was it uncomfortable? Scary? Yes and yes. Sometimes it was difficult to share how we were feeling and what we were learning in our personal practice of spiritual disciplines. But it was worth it. In the end we learned that by being vulnerable with each other we created a community. A place where we struggled, hurt, cried, and laughed. But it was also a place where we helped, comforted, consoled, and affirmed. Taking this class I learned a very important lesson. I am flawed, imperfect, a sinner. I don't have it together and I never will. And its okay. It's okay because so is everyone else. We are all the same, we are all flawed, we make mistakes, we sin. This class was good for me because it affirmed that I am normal. I am just as human as the next one. Yes I struggle, I get hurt, I have emotions. So do you. Something a bit more important struck me in the midst of my studies. God's grace IS enough. As much as I fight it some days and think that God can't possibly want someone as flawed as me, he DOES. I don't think I will ever fully grasp the meaning of God's grace. But I do know that I am thankful for it. Because without grace my sin is not okay. Disowning the very being who thought me up through my actions is not okay. But somehow, when I was not okay, God sent his son to earth to die so that I would be alight. This is unconditional love. Unfathomable love. That a man would lay down his life for his friends.

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. - 1 John 3:16